|e.v.e Believes no more|

HOHOHOHO *foreveralone mode

2012-02-09T22:31:00.001+08:00

2012-02-07T23:27:00.000+08:00

in case anyone miss me, no? :x

#day 5 after cny

2012-02-07T23:26:00.000+08:00

halo i slept for like 1 hour 45 minutes only and yet im in good mood today despite the laopo leaving for job interview today. although she might come back still after the interview but thn i dont know. as for me, it's time to fight before i go pursue my dream.ahem a childhood dream huh? :p

another 30 minutes T_______T I wanna sleep

mr wong kenot dahan liao so he asked me to study another new case. im reading my head keeps on falling down even at this moment. HELLLP

2.50pm :OMGEE OMGEE! I AM SO HAPPY !!! I have just done the research, gathered my guts, bring them to Mr Wong's office...He was like reading the paper in silence ( I thought i had to explain to him point my point Phew~~) Luckily !!! Omgee first he said, referring to the first issue : Reconciliation , saying the petioner wife is waiting for it blablabla then read read til last part ( regarding circumstance where arrears of maintenance is not recoverable if it accrued due more than 3 years before instituiton of the suit ) , he kind of reading it aloud and said "ya..you're right...you're right " "thank you " He even smiled when he said that.OMGEE I HAPPY TIL I CAN FLY ! I thought i couldnt make it. OMGEE T_T pardon my sotness.my first task ma =_= ok i just bragged on this in fb . ==

T______T just got shocked again when ah siong opened the door.

I always have the feeling that Ah Siong, being in the same room as me HE WOULD NEVER HIRE ME IF I WOULD EVER WANT TO WORK FOR HIM IN THE FUTURE (IF LAH) COS HE HAS WITNESSED MY LAZINESS EVERY SINGLE DAY !lols

#day 4 after cny

2012-02-07T23:25:00.001+08:00

Today I'm not that sleepy BUT after the failure in my plan to sleep straight away after home from work yesterday (I went to Da Ma to eat with Ah Sze jiejie and relatives as she's leaving today) ..HMM I feel like initiating the plan BUT.BUT BUT BUT my laopo is leaving tomorrow. Hmm why are so many people leaving huh..:((( Im gonna sleep for 2 hours I guess and tabao Sunny HIll Icecream to her house then tonight ~

Oh oh btw yesterday I was happy despite the nerves ...Mr Wong asked me to helped him piling the documents together -________- :)

为什么我倒office就那么怕冷去 ???zzz

3pm luu ! hmm mr ah siong everytime u enter into the room i ll get heart attack +_+ can the door don't be so loud

#Day 3 after cny

2012-02-07T23:24:00.000+08:00

#day 3 after CNY

I slept for two hours only I AM FEELING EXTREMELY PHEK CHEK NOW !!!

9.39am HHHHH ELP

11.32am another 27 minutes to my nap time

#Day 1 after CNY

2012-02-07T23:22:00.000+08:00

CRY. I am very very very sleepy NAO. I want to sleep T_____T I just slept for 4 hours plus plus because mahjong-ed at Nona house until 2 yesterday !!!

I have done reading Family and Im going to type everything down now. Apparently Mr. Wong is not in yet today. So...

T___________________T IM SO GONNA SLEEP DURING THE ONE HOUR LUNCH BREAK ! Even though my mum called and asked me go eat tukahpeng

dielela. mr wong is here liao. die

Man this is so meng-paiseh-kan . Im dozing off every second.

Luckily I wasnt dozing off when Mr. Wong came in and gave me these 3 cases omgee he said hes gonna explain to me in the afternoon

TOILET TIME !

3.40pm Mr. Wong came in and gave us one iJustice calendar each =_= phew he called Ah Siong and I to his office just now. such a speedy explanation on the divorce cases. I have questions but dont dare to ask -_-

2012-01-22T22:33:00.001+08:00

it has been 10 days ! Didn't update cos' I didnt bring laptop to work !! ok my loso ahma sis is urging me to go now. tata Happy CNY !luv u all

#Day9

2012-01-13T22:50:00.004+08:00

I have a very very strong feeling that I am gonna be extremely extremely sleepy today T____________T help

Actually planned and had the mood to go lunch with collegues and wanna chia them also if I do but now i changedmymind edy ! Im so gonna sleep today during lunch break nomoreemovideos wtf

Laptop left 48 % 3 hours remaining, just charge it later la. For now, makan buku again !

I FORGOT TO BRING WATER T_________________________________________T

救命啊！！！这爱睡不是普通的爱睡

Food Im imagining now

CHEESE BAKED RICE

CRABS

FRIED OH CHIO FISH

FRIED CHICKEN WING
JIPIGU !!

STEAMED PRAWNS WITH CHILLI !

10.18 am Planned hao le! Im so gonna tabao cheese baked rice from Tun Jugah after work for Ebon And I :P

I guess this chambering student would never ever hire me next time , he has seen my super-laziness

Had 30 minutes power nap during lunch break. err ok well, 40 minutes? fine 45.

Also, got the laptop charged during that time, using the plug near the chambering sstudent's desk. And then there' s this cleaner come and clean the room we have to let her clean so I took the laptop at that time. sun bian go toilet, pee, wash my mug and buy mineral water downstairs T_T

4.46pm I feel guity today :x should be offtime soon ba ~

#Day 8

2012-01-13T22:42:00.000+08:00

A SLEEPY MORNING @____________________@ My eyes are shutting down every 5 seconds, then I tried to hold it from closing, reading everyline, csse after case, went to the toilet, closed my eyes and I could really fall asleep any second !!!

Everynight I would charge the laptop at home because there's no plug near my office desk. But this morning I realised I left the laptop uncharged because I didnt swtich the plug on FML so I charged it in the office outside the room I bet thats one the the reason I keep on falling asleep cos reading all the time is really men-sleepy-kan me.

guess Im gonna sleep during one hour lunch break later T___T

cannot deal with the phone tethering ! I cannot online ! this is absolute madness !! googled bout it , there was a susggestion to download android-wifi-tether but then have to get the phone rooted and the procedures trust me i ll never make it T_T is root is jailbreak for android ? zzz sounds like it HEY i just wanna online on my laptop at least i dont have to see my phone so obviously scrolling on fb to keep me awake . DIE

Nasi ayam for lunch ?? hmmm

GRR NO MORE WHAT NASI AYAM LE LAH I forgot to bring my purse. left it in my handbag ,forgot to "transfer" it to my uglyworkingbag T_______T guess it's miloroti lunch today ? I still thought today can eat baobao and be more energetic/ less sleepiness Boo :

so i ended up "makan milo" cos I realised i didnt bring tiok the roti also =____= neway, I just spent my lunch time watching some touching videos on youtube that teared me up. yeah in office =____= man , if only I can go online on this laptop ...

tell me the meaning of feeling sleepy ~~

#day 7

2012-01-11T18:35:00.002+08:00

So now it's officially a week eh? Hmm I arrived and parked my car at Travillion, because there, you dont have to display parking coupon ( no parking cost) . The carpark lots which are just next and also attach to the building I 'm working in now costs a lot, according to Linda. Well, I already told Ebon that she had to send me to work first then only Melissa and her can attend uni . Luckily Melissa' s mum could send them, else I'd be late ! It' s okay if it was last week, there's only two of us, it was either Linda or me who was late to office. But just now at it was only around8.15am that I arrived at the building I went straight to the ladies first, realising the office light is on, looked to the other side (the carpark) and Linda' s car is there. Wow, so early, earlier than me I thought. BUT GUESS WHAT ! ? As I walked into the office, and as I greeted Linda "Good Morning ", as I walked into my office room, I realised Mr. Wong is in his office too !! My goodness. Luckily, I wasn' t late. Luckily. The thing is the chambering student is not here yet. Hope he won' t get scolded :x I wonder if our working time differ cos' the operating time stated outside the firm is starting from 8am @_@ . Guess it is not complied strictly as it is written there, closing at 4.30pm also , but we always close at 5 pm :/ K, I guess it' s time to makan my buku (eat my books ) tata

p/s : I have to set a target ! I must, and will read and understand all these as soon as possible and report to Mr. Wong ! ush

9.10am IMPOSSIBRUU ! The chambering student is not here yet , nan dao he has OFF DAY ? hng UNFAIR !

ohokwell mr wong was peeping in the room using his eyes corner i thought he was checking whether im doing my work =_= but then I heard he said something to Linda afterwards then "siong". :x looking for the chambering student. hmmm

IM FEELING LIKE IM STUDYING HERE.now that my stress level are kinda high ( cos im not concentrating enough and not enough sleep fml ) i wonder if im delegated more tasks afterwards i might die.argh

10.11am MAN I AM SO SLEEPY , yeah I slept around 2am and woke up 6.30am what do you think, imma blame myself f-ing my own life *selfslap ,anyway, the statute book has gone missing ! must be mr wong who has taken it lar hor? cos he did ask me to leave all the books on the shelf after reading them. hmm must be him.

eyes closing

it helps a lil bit everytime i feel sleepy i walked to the window and bio my car got tiok saman not

hungry sai

man im really really hungry Im so not gonna skip lunch today, skipping dinner is a better idea

Linda just asked my I.C from me, saying that she need the photocopy of it to issue cheque ! woohoo. @_@

11.20am I thought mr wong is back but it turned out to be the chambering student. I know it sounds rude to call him like that but I dont know what is his proper name/spelling/ pronunciation T__T btw he looks like Ah Jie, the car workshop's taukeh son

AH Chen Jiejie coffeee shop -_-

11.39am my gosh ! sleep si. toilet time !

12.09pm im skipping lunch anyway, gonna have cereal in office *___*

supah sleepy.tired. I hope today is not going to be pengsan day because yesterday i felt so dizzy after not eating the whole day.

oh well another 4 hours to go !

1.12pm the chambering student asked me again . this time he asked if i ve eaten anything for breakfast and I said yesh, he asked me further how many meals I ve per day and I hesitated, when he guessed 2 meals? I said ya 2 meals. T______T shoot me I LIED megusta

1.31pm MAN MY EYES ARE LITERALLY CLOSING ALREADY HELP ME

2.30pm another two and a half hour yay lol working is counting how many hours left to off from from work

Phew* heart almost jumped out 3.16pm

gang ji chut liao =_= why so weird one , on 11th day of the month. but i've only worked for a week then get salary liao.zz I' d say allowance.

3.41pm went to toilet ! tu yi xia tu yi xia now less than an hour to go.

Everytime he' ll be kind and smile to me, but I don 't want to look at him, sitting here as if he is not here, no manners much huh? T______T

3.50pm OMGEE I just heard a good news , chu 8 cai kai gong ! (although I have a dinner on chu 8 night, going to be cheongsam girl *_* )

4.47pm Ai Pang Kang lo~~~ gonna jam jam jam for an hour though then love feast at 7pm T______T dao di shi si dian ban fang gong hai shi wu dian la :/

5.17pm MY GOSH HOW COME AH BOI PANG KANG ONE ??

#day 6

2012-01-11T18:34:00.000+08:00

Today is supposed to be day 5 though, because I didnt turn up to work yesterday =___= reason? I was too tired to wake up, and massive self-induced headache. I woke up at 7am but set my alarm to 9am so that I could wake up and give office a call. Instead of Linda, the chambering student (whom I called " the fresh lawyer" previously ) answered the phone and I guess I pronounced his name wrongly, he couldnt get me, he was like...HARRR? haha . anyway, here I am today. sitting here and trying to read as much as I can, afraid that Mr. Wong might come in anytime and ask " so, what do you understand about this case ? " or "so, what have you read" . TIAM. Cannot liak zhuar anymore, I am no longer alone in this room. so say baibai to my lovely addictive fb and also sleepy bugs. but I could come here at times to type something then copy paste and UP to my blog.

10.14am I have just done reading my second case of divorce. Hmm reading all these made me wonders..meeting someone you love, getting married to him, having a home with children, and as they are growing up, ending the marriage, coming to an agreement as to who to have the custody of the children, division of property, having the children over the firm to sign the documents of transfer. Poor children. They are still young. Adults are so selfish.hmm

10.48am Man , im so sleepy !! Plus I need to go toilet !!! I dont know why Im too afraid to go toilet. The "paisehness" to walk out and in of the office I guess, and the fear of meeting Mr,Wong, argh but until when I can hide? @_@

niao ji

T___________________________________________________________________________________T

i tell you. the feeling of going to toilet after holding your pee for more than an hour is AWESOME and painful too wtf.

I've made up my mind. Tmr im going to tell my bro my thoughts. What I want. I know he wants to help me and I appreciate his concern and intention but what he wants is not what I want, and what I want, I'll never regret it even if it means risks of meeting difficulties and failures in the road ahead ! :)

I've no idea how the rest in this office bear with this BUT THIS NOISE PRODUCED BY THE RENOVATION UPSTAIRS is driving me crazy.

ZNG ZNG ZNG. What is worse is that I had to hear the same thing at my living place previously, and the work ceased now my working place. This is my fate. LIFE. fml T_T

I didnt go out for lunch except toilet and daydreaming session today. When the chambering student told me sometime around 12.06pm that we can go and eat then, I told " ni men chi bah, wo mei you chi " and just now, having returned from lunch he asked me again, "ni mei you chi?" and I said "mei you, wo xian zai zai jian fei , yao guo nian le" He looked blur though after hearing my answer. Very demotivating huh :/ Anyway, I have not weighted myself yet but this operasi-kurang-makan of mine has been initiated since a week ago, hope it works. Of course, once Im ready financially I'll go to the gym. Hopefully I find some motivation to go jogging or do some sit ups daily for now !

*YAWNING WITH THE SMELL OF COFFEE

2.09pm Does coffee work on you in keeping you awake? For me, it doesnt help much. I remember drinking five glasses of coffee during SPM and I still feel sleepy. I was young at that time though, I could stay awake for 3 days continuously.

3 more hours to go.

The staff named Linda in my office is seriously very funny and cute lo ! She is very opened and comfortable working in this office, she can talk loudly on phone in Hokkien or Hakka and laughing cheerfully, can even answer her own personal calls with her phone ringtone CNY song -_-

Speaking of Hokkien , I often get a lot of people directed to my blog with them searching for "how to say I miss you in Hokkien" kektiok. I'd reveal it now, it is "wa sio lu" , or "wa jin sio lu" for I miss you very much.haha hope this helps, guys.

3.07pm I feel like going to toilet again. Man, how nice if the toilet is in the room . In reality, it is so far away, not lah far that far, which requires hours of driving, but certainly the type of distance that makes me think twice, thrice and even now kek-jio situation im facing now.

Neduncheliyan Balasubramaniam v Kohila Shanmugam is a very berry long case T_T

4.16pm another 44 minutes to go. toilet time for now. to pangjio and also wash my cute mickey mouse mug.

I have a question: Does your pee smell like coffee after you consumed coffee? Im very curious. cos mine does. =_______________=

i have another question. Is it abnormal not talking to your collegue who is the only person sharing the same office room? cos I dont. =__________=

4.38pm: Ebon's gonna be late today she needs to send Melissa back home first cos she has dinner to attend so I might have to wait at Atok Kopitiam, my tummy is calling for Char Kueh Tiaw but my mind is telling my tummy that my body is trying to go on diet,I wonder which will prevail?

4.51pm off from work ! shutdown-ing laptop !

好累也好乱哦

2012-01-09T15:09:00.000+08:00

the wind+water made curls

2012-01-05T16:46:00.000+08:00

#day 3

2012-01-05T10:26:00.007+08:00

9.19am my goodness. Im so sleepy now. I didnt sleep the whole night. thanks to my bestest bestie. hmm u have successfully gotcha-ed me T_T

reached home at 2 after the said "prank" and then its too alang alang for me to sleep so i went out with shenton and we went to damai. as crazily as bfore but this time is even crazier. to make things crazier, on our way back, we thought the traffic jam is normal for schooling/working hour but who knows almost every road in kuching is flooded with rain water over the whole night.

Bing bing dont have to work because Bormill is flooded terribly. Unfair . i want a rest day too. then i can sleep for 10 hours or more before going out with ah fen n lywee to meet keith tonight :/

Milo+coffee =Mocha

2012-01-04T13:27:00.002+08:00

Much love and sleepiness from office,

Sleepy Headpig.

2012-01-03T20:09:00.002+08:00

Today is my first day doing attachment, I am very very nervous. Scarier thing is now Mr.Wong has not arived yet, and I am sitting here doing nothing. =_=

8.59am : die die die. With the laptop on the desk, I have nothing to do but to pretend that I have something to do, How? Should I ask them if there is anything I could help or should I just wait for Mr.Wong?

Oh ya by the way I have my own working desk :B The staff out there who opened the door this morning is Linda, I have taken her as Sister Lina mistakenly. A fresh lawyer who has just passed his CLP, sitting in the same office room as I is Kuok SIong, I hope I remember his name correctly.

Oh my..

9.16am Still here, dying.

9.23am He HAZ arrived. :x

out of sudden, i feel i have difficulty in breathing properly.

9.37am yay I finally gathered my guts and asked. Haz things to do now :p

9.49am Because I didnt want to sit like an idiot in the office, so I knocked on MrWong's door and lamely said, "Mr Wong, Hi" -_- And he stood up, and said he would give me some previous cases to read. Phew luckily, who knows Im going to be forgotten like that, sitting for the whole day doing nothing.

Law Reform ( Marriage and Divorce) Act 1976. That is the Act I have to study now. There is a divorce case I have to study too. Mr Wong and the fresh lawyer is going to Sibu this afternoon, For the whole week , I'll have to read all these ! *yay a bit cos Im alone. But he seems quite nice. I think too much, No scoldings so far. He said he is gonna get me a table lamp , before that, I can use the fresh lawyer's table when he is not around.

11.07am : I have read up to section 53, *sleepiness in the air* Well, hungry. DId not eat anything in the morning due to.... NO TIME. woke up at 6.30 , realising the phone was not charged properly at all.. then departed from home at 7.40 am =.= Traffic jam all the way from Mjc, and then 3rd mile and near Saberkas there. Luckily I reached Petanak on time. 8.25am. Hmm, any suggestion on alternative route, of less traffic congestion ?

Argh, I dont know what time is lunch, and for how long. TO be honest i dont even know what time is my time off from work. I guess it is 5pm? the usual normal wokring hours?

12.21pm: m gonna fall asleep any second i tell u *selfslap . If only I can connect to the wifi from the Atok KOpitiam downstairs....

1.08pm just done having lunch. I didnt know lunch time is allocated from 12-1pm until Linda came in and told me. Then I went to the toilet to freshen up and realising there was only half an hour left I went to the Atok Kopitiam downstairs

MY CONTACT LENS JUST FELL OFF MY EYE scaryshit its too cold and dry in this room T_T

fine, back to the story, went to kopitiam not having appetite .. Wanted to sit outside at the corner table, out of sudden I heard my name being called several times. Its Linda. She thought I was waiting for my sis and I said no so she asked me to join their table T_T *paiseh. Ordered french toast with cheese and milk. was hungry, but then no appetite. Linda talked a lot to me, asking me questions.. And she treated me for the bill, saying it is my first day, I passed her the money refusing her kind intntion but she stuffed the money back into my purse. Lol thank u Miss New Collegue !

3.53PM :last one hour !I cant wait to go back ~gonna take a nap immediately in the car lol. Evelyn please remember to bring a mug and coffee/milo tmr pls

2012-01-02T22:50:00.002+08:00

Just had Sunny Hill Ice Cream !! How come it tasted so nice..after so long, I finally found back my love for sunny hill ice cream again !! T__T ♥

Hmm tmr gotta start working le la, hope I wont get scolded *nerves

2011-12-31T00:42:00.002+08:00

Something in your eyes, makes me want to lose myself, makes me want to lose myself...in your arms...

chipmunks

2011-12-26T23:34:00.005+08:00

Zhilian photo of the day ! It's in the sixth camwhoring album already lol.

Going to damai on WED! yooooooooooooooooooooo! hoo. And Chipmunks tmr night yo !

p/s:ohya theres this photo i really want to share on fb ! shoooooooooooo chuteeeeeeeeeeeeee ! theres these two kids playing on the macbook "chipmunks" effect and theres this very very cute ah pek appearing at their back with all their faces chipmunks! hmm i want but my sis' and my phone batt was flat :(( T_T

Watched Mission Impossible 4 ! my goodness it is really really nice. exciting and funny ! I want to watch MI 1,2 and 3 too! Tom Cruise aneh lao liao still so eng dao!

Mum 's staying over at yiyi's ochard tonight cos the matang road is all flooded. hmm It has been raining for so many days already, continuously .

erm . erm. erm

Man, I want that hair !!

2011-12-25T21:04:00.007+08:00

Nails done by EbonChao banban

When I love meituxiuxiu (and my eyebags too fyi -____-) too much

Us @ Uncle bday~

And my xiaogou tang yuan~ super cute right? those are specially made mostly for nona, then the rest of em' tried one each XD

ARGH *hold my breath*

so gorgeous right? well at least the colour, everytime i get my hair dyed ,somehow it ll turn out very orange-ah-lian-like. Hmm I dont care Im gonna tell mum its okay, dont have to buy me cny clothes le just spare me some money to go saloon ba :P

2011-12-24T22:28:00.002+08:00

I Love kuaciiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii ♥

I cut hao front hair luu

2011-12-19T22:10:00.003+08:00

Brought ah le ah xun out today. To Hock Lee centre arcade and also Aladdin chicken rice.How come it is so expensive to dine at there :/ 4 adults 2 seh kia = RM54 plus plus eh .. tsk tsk tsk

On a sidenote, I finally fulfilled my childhood dream, my left eye is a bit blurrish , gonna check my eye soon and buy contact lens with degree le I suppose

The snow that I missed

2011-12-18T02:58:00.002+08:00

Its actually snowing in Newcastle right now !!how jealous am I !!!well right now I really don't know if I've made the right choice coming back !going to Singapore ?I'm not sure if that's the right choice either ??hmm when can everything be smooth and meaningful again ?:( I want to be able to be myself again. The spontaneous happy carefree self.Btw I cut my front hair short Liao uh Nyah si beh tahan

Hi ya it's so stupid nowadays can't blog using mobile grrr *bites

2011-12-15T06:11:00.002+08:00

the moment when I wanted to say NO and yes came out of my mouth

2011-10-30T09:49:00.002+08:00

Stumbled upon this in Tumblr. Hmm.. Touching.

cotton candy

2011-10-27T04:39:00.002+08:00

This is my current front hair length. SERIOUSLY, THERE ARE MANY TIMES I REALLY CANNOT TAHAN WANNA CUT EM' ALREADY :/ but I tell myself, no Evelyn you cannot do this , you have been wanting to have long front hair you should make it at least once init.

To be honest, I miss my old self. Motivated in doing anything. Simple things make me happy. The way I used to write in this blog can show how different I am now. The current me , I dont love to talk anymore . I dont know why. Maybe, I'll be... better in time !

Cant wait for the room to be ready ! Paint bought ! It's cotton candy PINK ! ♥

dinner i cooked tonight

2011-10-23T05:56:00.001+08:00

first day working

2011-10-22T09:42:00.003+08:00

coke diet coke lemonade still water sparkling water soda water foster carling stella dry wine half pint one pint two pint hmmmmmm @____@ first day working turned out not bad time passed slowly but i worked from 6-9 only though lol

bought myself these gloves as it is getting COLD

my pau face

my usual dilemma AGAIN !

to cut or not to cut? current length is not short not long ! alang alang ! very sien ! Hmmmph :/

yo

2011-10-21T08:44:00.003+08:00

before going out. photo is blurrish. reminds me of cherry. she always love photos of hers taken blurrish lol

edited using mei tu xiu xiu. a very good app. can download it on iphone and also samsung. Definitely ll be using this alot next time. I mean next month onwards : p

And today is her birthday ! Vani aka Bunny ! Recall moments when she was still here in Newcastle. hmm.. she never fail in making us laugh... Miss her !

p/s: cant wait and a bit scared for first day working tomorrow :x i mean later.

black is the colour

2011-10-20T08:15:00.001+08:00

going to start working on friday :x so tmr i have to wake up and go to town to find black shirt, black pants, and black shoes ~

Kuching-->Newcastle

2011-10-12T04:57:00.012+08:00

Well, this post was saved in draft for few days already. The photo uploader is still not working until today so it's fine, I would just post the rest another day. Maybe I wont. They ll be all uploaded in Facebook though.

So, I went back to Kuching on the 10th of August, arriving on the 11th. Was supposed to go back after graduation but since I check my air ticket last minute, the ticket available was expensive and friends kept on persuading me to stay longer so ..yeah.

I was so emo upon leaving Newcastle. Okay, who don't ? Especially when you stayed for a year and then you get to experience the four different season, yes I was lucky I had autumn, winter, spring and then summer. So, the day before I left, Ling brought me to the town and went shopping. When I walked in those shops, I was so sad, thinking that I won't be able to visit the stores in Eldon Square and buy or wear those clothes anymore. I didn't sleep throughout the night before my flight , I was last minute packing like crazy, I spent hours packing and when my friends went in the room, finding me still packing pathetically on the floor, they start rolling my clothes, put em in my luggage and *tub* it's all done in less than 15 minutes. miracle, isn't it? How guys can finish a task girl needs hours in that short time...girls...

So, emo emo emo saying goodbyes and all to my friends, I went on my journey alone.

Photos that I couldnt upload are those yumcha, outing photos ..nevermind..

We spent our mooncake festival at Cherry's house playing lantern.. and we brought lele and ah xun along.

Me, trying to hang those lanterns on the tree.Oh, I miss my blonde hair. I dyed it dark brown because otherwise I cant do my I.C. Yeah =_= my mum found out that I lost my I.C after checking through my bag and stuff as she usually does..questioning me all the time why I keep on bringing my passport out ..because that is the only thing can prove my identity=_=

Us :)

Then , as usual lah ~ when we were small, we ll play with candles after the lanterns. But, only Desmond and Evon are playing outside the house because Ah Le and Ah Xun are not supposed to learn, yet.

It's a heart-shaped !

The sweet couple..

Okay, now someone tells me why this photo becomes like this :/

Man, looking at this photo makes me hungry ! This is the famous AFC (Angie Fried Chicken) , my mum's na-shou-cai.

We were having potluck at Laura's house. Evon with the fruit salad and Auntie unwrapping the Kueh Tiaw as Bingbing just looking on.. hmmm lazy girl ! haha

Everyone - Ah boy, Cherry, Kevin Liew, Auntie Uncle, Ah beng, Desmond, Evon , Bing Bing .

Uncle and Auntie - very happy. But, of course each time we go to their house, I can tell they miss Nona a lot. Especially, when we talk about going overseas stuff, then or whatsapping and bbm-ing nona. Hmm

Family dinner.

Salted egg crabs. Not nice, unlike the one by Ling Loong at Topspot Seafood but these crabs had so much roes in em ! my goodness. I ate until gelik. Dinner was at Country Court, 3rd mile.

Da Q and Ah xun. I just find this photo very..heartwarming.

Then, we went to watch Mr. Bean ! Johnny English reborn but we had to wait more than an hour in the Spring before the movie starts.

This is Desmond and Ebon waiting outside MBO.

Bingbing was so blur that she tells me the next day, she was wondering why we ngeh ngeh wanted to watch mr bean on that night, forgetting that it is the last night we can watch movie together because I was leaving. Hmmph how bosim. She didn't go with us.

Well, after sorting out financially that I cannot do my master yet, and I don't want to do my CLP in KL, I was thinking of a way to return to Newcastle. So eventually, I made up my mind and decided to return to Newcastle and apply for PSW afterwards.

Me, my backpack and Timaomao, who went straight after work cos my flight was at 8 pm.

I dont know why but each time before I leave, mum would want to have dinner together at KFC. It has been a norm or something =_= I was laughing and wondering..this bunch of people concerns more about the food over me. Hmmmph

Just before I went in the departure gate. Aizat helped to take this photo , it is so funny how he had to wait for me cos I hugged each of them in this photo one by one so you can imagine how long it took lol. Ya, I flew back together with Aizat this round, at least I'm not flying alone.Purposely booked the same flight as his.

Now, I'm living in Gateshead and following photos are the views I get to see everyday. It is across the bridge of Newcastle and we can have the city view, so nice especially at night.

Pardon the blurrish photo of this one. And hmm I'm still very lazy to learn more about photography and also how to fully utilize my dslr.

Til then, current status is graduated, unemployed, waiting for the time to apply psw, finding a stable job, keep on falling sick. Yes, sick. Was having fever. And now. Terrible cough.

Hope the photo uploader is working fine soon and that I will have the mood to update this blog more often. It has been sooooooooo dead. Well, take care and tata!

2011-10-08T07:24:00.003+08:00

im so cold.

its so freaking cold out there.

and did i hear that it is supposed to snow today?

hmm

i dont know.

IM SO COLD.

2011-10-01T00:53:00.001+08:00

emptiness.

i dont know.

i feel like a fool.

Eve is back in Newcastle!

2011-09-24T01:09:00.000+08:00

a very lazy update

2011-09-08T17:18:00.001+08:00

guess where I am? I am at Swinburne's library -________- yeah. at first, reading notes, trying to prepare for Leh Ding tomorrow. It will be the last tutoring session I have with him. well, to update all of u a bit, I'm flying back to UK pretty soon, because I have to work and save money for my master! And that would mean another winter yo! but it ll be autumn first. til then, tata.

2011-08-16T16:18:00.000+08:00

I AM BACK !!! yuhoo ^^

3 more days

2011-08-07T11:25:00.001+08:00

9 days to go..

2011-07-31T18:30:00.002+08:00

And I'll be back in Kuching.

Time flies! Oh my gosh! Remembering how I said I ll update this blog frequently just before I flied to UK from M'sia. Not only I didnt do it, I didnt upload a lot of video as I promised, as usual Im pretty much too addicted to FB but recently Im kinda not as active in FB anymore. I guess when Im active it means Im really happy with ma life, Im not recently so ya, hence the disappearance. But hey stupiak eve, u r so gonna leave this place in another 9 days time @_@ Hmm~ oh well. How can I fully utilise these 9 days. and still I have a lot alot of herbalife remaining in those cute bottles fine they are not cute but how. im not going to bring em back maybe i should cos these 9 days i dont feel like torturing myself not eating nice food in UK argh how. zz

Uhm . thats all for now. my mood not very hoh cos ler. got two guys say wanna go carboot sale wor. one of em woke me up at 8,30am so i was gewttign ready until now. very good. 4 hours and 42 minutes have passed. I ve done camwhoring, onlin ing.updating this deadly blog, fb-ing. skype with nona with the lousy lin e. argh buh bai

master of law

CLP

kahwin seh kia? =_=

today I'm officially a degree graduate! photos time! but I really miss my family

2011-07-18T13:30:00.002+08:00

2011-06-29T21:00:00.003+08:00

Dear Lord, I am very unhappy. Very unhappy. First, my life is messed up. I am very unhappy with myself. Dear Lord, I feel unhappy, I want my old self and my old views of life back. Dear Lord..

First, my sleeping time is a shit.. I dont have enough sleep and my mood is hence a shit too.

second, I ve got my result back. I get what I put in, but im unhappy with myself. Again. And I am now flamed up for my CLP. I ll do better and I ll!

I am gonna sleep now, bbq with the rest tonight at Aaron's place. He moved in with Jasmine and Im gonna live there after my tenancy ends!

Dear Lord, I am sorry. Dear self, I am sorry too.

2011-06-28T12:45:00.001+08:00

when things are kept in your heart that it overflows

when things are so wrong you dont know where to start in making em right

when you just feel like sleeping

when you are demotivated

when you are good but you keep on letting yourself down

when you are not being yourself

2011-06-24T09:55:00.001+08:00

ANYWAY, I'VE DYED MY HAIR ! err orange-ah lian ka-ler =_____= want to see? havent even post on fb. lang lang aka nona, grace and chuiping has got my photo via whatsapp though : x

NEXT POST WILL BE ON

2011-06-24T09:51:00.000+08:00

Lake District and a lot a lot of places I ve been to, a lot a lot of things that have happened yet of which I ve been procrastinating on updating. In this diary of mine. lalala

Ohana

2011-06-20T19:06:00.005+08:00

What family means for you? What family means to me, I was born in a very wonderful family, when I was 4 years old, my parents are blessed with another baby girl, aka my sis, Evon. So yes, we have 4 years gap in age difference. Often enough, we are mistaken as twins or at least around the same age or worst case scenario people actually believe it when I tried to say I am the younger one. And from being freaked out, she is now having =____= lame and annoyed expression each time I tried doing that.

If you ask me this question 5 years ago, the answer would be different back then and now.

Our family was a middle-income family. My dad worked in the government sector until I was in my kindy time. Soon enough, as I turned 8, my dad went to Miri to explore , rather altogether a different field of career. We would talked and talked to dad via phone every night. I remember, mum would dial dad's number and she would get my sis and I sitting down next to her near the telephone waiting excitedly for my dad to answer our call.

Then, mum would turn the loudspeaker mode on so that three of us could chat with him at the same time. That was in year 1996. As I was studying in Standard 3 in St Mary, one day my dad finally decide to bring us for a trip in Bintulu-Miri. I remember it was during sunset time that he brought mum, sis and I to Tanjung Batu beach in Bintulu one evening. My mum totally, fell in love with the view and the atmosphere, the relaxing living style in Bintulu. Believe it or not, my mum probably went to Spring Mall in Kuching for less than 20 times, well maybe 30 cos I worked parttime in Charles and Keith before. She never like crowded place. Unless she is spending her leisure time with all those uncles aunties =__= The whole point our dad brought us along for the trip is because he had another job opportunity in Bintulu's MLNG.

So eventually we moved to Bintulu and stay at this place called Pine Court Apartment, my Da Q Meh, QQ, Q Meh, cousins actually tagged along with the moving-house- trip and we had photos of those days at my Qmeh's house I guess. There, started my most beautiful, memorable 7 yrs , happiest chapter of my life.

Why would I say so? Am I not happy now? Well, of course . It is half right, I am still happy, but Ohana means family, family means no one gets left behind. and the problem I am having now is that I forget and I am not applying the principle "expect nothing, appreciate everything", put it short, I dont know how to appreciate. I expect too much. Focus too much on the closed windows, taking all those opened ones for granted.

Writing this post because, these days I am very emotional, friends keep on asking me not to be one, I wonder why, ..I'd be perceived as attention seeker, perhaps everyone needs certain level of attention, care. Whatever it is, what I am trying to say is. Family. What is your definition of family?

If it was not for the past we have been going through, we are not what we are today.

Maybe my sis and I would be like any other spoiled children. We still are, lil daughter in my mum's eyes.

I am writing this because I want all of you to know. How great it feels to be in a family.

I remember scolding one of my bestfriend, to the extend I cried so badly. She was either quarreling with her brother or complaining about her mum's bad mood. I scolded her. We are such close friends. Perhaps thats the very reason I got so angry. I said to her, " wo bu yao ni fa sheng he wo men yi yang de she qing, wo bu yao ni guo wo men guo de she qing cai fa xian, you yi ge mei man de jia you duo hao . wo bu yao ni hou hui "

We either hide it, "fu yan", change topics, or we choose to reveal, normally I'd be the one who tend to share. My sis is not. the type.

We hardly share our personal problems unless we come to a very devastated point I guess. There was a night I feel my blanket is shaky. THe blanket that I shared with her. It is her crying. I was so helpless, I just tried to keep silent, cried, silently. But I know. She knows. Both of us cried.

We have been running from reality. In fact, we are not having 'life' . We no longer watch tv as a family as before, we dont listen to songs via entertainment channels, everything is different and we just dont like to stay at home when mum is not around. We would "run away".

This is my sis. People tend to say that we look alike. People who are close to us would say we dont : ) cos they are able to tell, differentiate, and most of all, we have different personalities.

Erm, I miss my family. Sometimes I am thinking. Emo lai gan ma? Especially if emo due to smt that is not as important as my family.

Evelyn, wake up. This is your priority. Faith, your and Evon's faith. You need to do something alongside your prayers . Faith.

2011-06-19T10:44:00.001+08:00

did u ever know that i had mine on you?

darling so share with me

your love if you have enough

your tears if ur holding back

or pain if thats what it is

oh how can i let u know

im more than the dress

and the voice

just reach me out then

u ll know that u are not dreaming

darling so there u are

with that look on ur face

as if ur never hurt

as if ur never down

shall i be the one for u

who pinches u softly but sure

2011-06-18T23:56:00.004+08:00

2011-06-17T11:11:00.004+08:00

before I was off to meet Vani to go to Farah's house for bbq with the rest yesterday. and at night , had hotpot at Jasmine's.

On a happier note, I am done with my 3 days intensive Swinburnian life ! hoho. I was almost dead, well I was dead, very dead. Was helping my sis with her English assignment and I can conclude by saying IT IS HARDER THAN THE LAW I VE BEEN READING . omgee now whenever Ebon asks me about the assignment my nerves ll freak out my shoulder will become stiff. =______=

Nona is having her Consti paper .soon in 15 minutes. Her last paper , next monday then SHE MERDEKA also liao!

Aaron, Aizat them going to Sunderland later in the afternoon. I was hanging out at Aaron's room with him and Vani. Until 4 am and when the skies are getting bright, hmm thats when we start to feel guilty and think it is the time to go to bed, I ve been telling myself I must sleep 3 days 3 nights, cos I ve been feeling that Im sleep deprived for ages. but but but. there are always ACTIVITIES. humph

but :) . this saturday Lihjing and I are going to be "princesses" again. hoho will write about it and post some photos. Erm. I miss updating this blog like before. I miss the carefree life.

I shouldnt think too much.

Oh ya. I dyed my hair Marshmallow Brown. Marshmallow : ) but of course la, as usual, my dark black hair so cant really go in the KALER=______= and the fact that I ve dyed it black to cover my coloured hair before I come to UK. U shall never ever dye ur hair black if you want to colour ur hair in nearest future. but ler. k lah. Hiao. and my hair getting longer also . good news. hoho

2011-06-15T20:44:00.003+08:00

actually im not afraid of caring too much for now, im afraid for the day I'd care no more. when memories are no longer significant to me, i no longer refresh them in my mind, i no longer listen the songs that mean so much now, im afraid. of forgetting. and time.

2011-06-14T19:19:00.002+08:00

Ok now, let's be honest with my feeling. I feel sad, to be exact, extremely sad. I want this to end. I want to move on. But at the same time, I don't want to let go of the memories. Those are too beautiful, you wont know.

Another one month, there's only one month left, Evelyn. You're so gonna regret this in future. Get up, wake up, have a nice shower, dress up, go out, show up! Listen to more beautiful melodies, implant them in your heart, go out there, reaching for the sunshine you've been falling for.

Not every sweetdream shall have sweet ending, perhaps the fact that they never last is the very fact that makes them sweet too, cos' dreams remain still as, dreams.

til then, smile!

The most difficult feeling when you wake up in the morning, memories lingering in your head,emptiness felt in your chest, past holding you back, and you lost your reasons to smile again.you know this isnt right, you gotta move on, but you dont know what to do

2011-06-10T09:19:00.002+08:00

what is my feeling right now? terrible. give me a terrible term, that would best describe it. i feel horrible. first i screwed my exam. this round, i guess it is even worse than that of segi final year. i am not kidding. i remember my lecturer asked me, is it because you are in a relationship that you start coming to class late sometimes skipping class and that your performance dropped? well this time round is even worse i dont dare to think about it this is united kingdom this is uk it is not like you fail you pay rm700 and you can resit whilst proceeding to the next level

i want and i must proceed to clp i am going to live with carissa in kl and enrol in brickfields exam on next year june it is rm550 a month for accommodation plus bills and internet and best of all i think i am gonna live a proper life and i can go to the church with her too

i feel horrible terrible why am i so weak why cant i focus on myself why i have to be that kind of stupid girl that falls for guy and then

please wake up i remember asking laura to slap me the next time she senses im falling in love that was so long ago of course she never did even if she did i guess those who are in love would never listen but perhaps what someone told me before is right two steps forward one step backwards i am the kind 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 forward guess it is time for a change now i will still be 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13... forward , but for myself my future my family and blablabla

i need to sleep and disappear for 3 days a week or as long as i can to be myself back

2011-06-07T09:56:00.000+08:00

I miss you, I really do.

YO !

2011-06-05T13:15:00.001+08:00

I am back :)

2011-05-30T07:58:00.002+08:00

This was in Rome. I am now in Venice. Hmmmmm so far , this is the place I love and of which I thought is the most beautiful place I have seen.

:( memories, can you dont be memories?

2011-05-19T18:27:00.019+08:00

of Chicken and Lamb. lol

2011-05-17T22:32:00.002+08:00

7 days. another 7 days, I will be in my examination hall, having my Company Law paper, wtf I just deleted table, typed table instead of paper. WTFFF nvm maybe my brain cannot work properly anymore. Hmmm

the ..

then the next day I ll be leaving for my Euro trip. Company's paper on the 25th, Ah Pek Khaihee will reach on that very day, Im planning to fetch him at the central station (the train station) here right after my exam at 12.30pm.

We will then have to leave Newcastle the next day, to Edinburgh for a day trip and in the evening We ll fly to Italy.

25th ll then be a very busy day, for being a panda post-exam and it is also the only day I get to gather with my friends who are some leaving Newcastle for good, some having their Year 2 now so they are going back to their countries (like Douglas going back to Hong Kong). I wont able to see them anymore by the time I return cos I might come back only on 4th of June. Haven't book any ticket yet for Ncl return.

and 30th of May. I wont be in Ncl. I wonder if I still can use my phone. but nvm. Time to .. not dwell too much in humanity, emotion, negativity, hmm. I will be alright.

: )

Focus and love yourself, family. friends who u can call family too.

2011-05-16T20:15:00.002+08:00

Hi all, : ) I am just back in my room, having done my second final year law paper, Evidence Law. Nope, this time I didn't fall asleep . I wrote 7 pages for Q1 and 2 and a half for Q2. hmm as usual. ovewrite. FML. dont F my paper result ok liao :x baibai

friday the 13th my foot

2011-05-14T07:29:00.002+08:00

yo, going to party now! pre-Evidence Law exam party :x

define huai ren. People who exists and does good deeds by differentiating out hao ren.

Se- la- mat- Se-Jah-te-ra C--i-k-g-uuuuuuuuu

2011-05-12T01:37:00.000+08:00

Haha I miss how everyone stood up lazily and greet the teacher reluctantly whenever teacher entered the class during primary sch/high school time.hence the title of this post =____=

Today is 11th of May, had my first paper on Monday, guess what. I almost, err I meant, I already did, I fell asleep during the first hour of my EU Law Paper, I was writing all the way though, so whenever I made myself awake, each time I tried to open my eyes wide and big, I would start cancelling and striking out nonsense stuff I wrote. Yet, I never leave the hall to wash up a bit or whatever to refresh myself, I should but I didn't.

My first time doing such shit. hmm

Just keep my fingers crossed, hoping that paper ll be kind to me, let me pass and now one is down, left with two more and I ll be free.

I want to go to the beach I want to go~ The sun is bright and at some point, hiding itself but once it is out again it never fail in cheering me up, I want to go out and go sunbathing. Luckily it is not that easy to get your skin tanned here, my sis Ebon is very mm song aka beh song aka jealous whenever she gets to skype with me or see my new photos uploaded in FB, she would claim I have really fair skin but I'd tell her it was because of the sunlight (when I sit next to the window skyping with her) then she would laugh sarcastically and said "so you mean you are fair during daytime and by night time you ll turn dark/ not that fair anymore la? Bullshit la" hahaha.

Fine, I might be faired skin now but when I return to Kuching, I guess she will be fairer than me, that's what I told her to anti-depress her. lol

anyway, next paper would be Evidence. It is open-book exam. We never know it is one until the exam is around the corner, so there are friends esp Chen Lih Jing kept saying if she knew earlier she ll take Evidence but hey zhabor we dong-know also mar~

good for me, cos the final paper, also the scariest paper------> C O M P A N Y L A W ! *screams

Amen.

Hmmmmmmm thats all for now, am not using my computer so no zhilian photo of mine. good for your eyes, people ! but not for me . cos' I am zhilian aka camwhore queen : x keep getting suan here. those friends here. And my recent trademark pose is :0. the pouting, piggie mouth pose (T_T) v

2011-05-10T06:01:00.000+08:00

define my feeling right now.

happy go lucky

2011-05-09T15:01:00.001+08:00

halo.

I am very lihai and as what my mum has always been saying.

bu zhi dao si zi zhen yang xie : )) :x

Yo, having my very first paper in UK in another 1 and a half hour time.

Amen !

:x i miss you, huai ren!

someone like you

2011-05-06T04:16:00.003+08:00

Nevermind I'll find someone like you.

This song keeps on repeating in my head cos'I keep on replaying the song. W-h-y? Sometimes it lasts in love , but sometimes it hurts instead. Can we, human, actually control our feelings and emotion? Or, are we the type , the more we try to refrain, the more we are not able to control from falling in the trap?

What if a person keeps on implying all sort of things to prove you he is not a good guy and yet your very intuition says he is not like that and you fall for him, even when you yourself dont realise when it started?

Do you believe in fate? what is fate? How long a fate can last? Is the fate created with the right person? But how do you define "the right person"? what is right and what is not? if there could only be ONE and only right person, are the rest wrong ones? if they are wrong ones, did we not learn and had at least some memories from them? and could a person , who was once wrong, be right again?

One could say I am crapping and yes perhaps I dont even know what I am typing right now. Hey..

I am just a girl. I wish I could find someone like you, but I wish that someone is you. can I be real with my own feelings? perhaps I shouldnt ask for more? single sided love could be better than two, cos things never end and it wont hurt both, it hurts only one. which is me. but why again, apart from this song , I listen to the song : two is better than one. urgh eve! wake up. study for ur exam

徐若瑄-不愛了

2011-05-04T21:34:00.000+08:00

04052011

2011-05-04T10:54:00.002+08:00

So, today is 4th of May. Hmm I'm having my first paper on the 9th, which means I only have less than 5 days time remaining.... Very good, minus sleeping time, bathing time, playing time (fine there wont be playing time anymore) ... it will be halved, which means 2 and a half days.

very good.

Segi glory moments.

Why did I score so well for A Level? Luck. Evelyn, why do you have such a luck? It is destroying your life. Your so called luck. Because of that, you never learn to be disciplined. Never study all the time. Study for the sake of passing exam. Hmmmmmmmmmmm

: ) heart oh heart. Can you please dont get urself broken again. I dont want.

cant wait until exam is over T_T :)))

2011-04-30T18:09:00.000+08:00

Day 1 (26/5) Newcastle --> Edinburgh --> Pisa

Take train from newcastle (740am) to edinburgh waverly station (925am). walk around, visit castle. after lunch, take bus at train station to airport at around 250pm. Reach Airport by 330pm. Take ryan air flight at 5.05pm to Pisa (8.05pm). Take train to central station, either walk to take taxi to hotel francesco stay 1 night.

Day 2 (27/5) Pisa --> Rome

See the famous The Leaning Tower of Pisa – This is the monument that among the others of the “Piazza die Miracoli”, stirs the imagination of everybody, from the old to the young. Take lunch. Then take train down from pisa centrale (1pm) to Rome (350pm).

Check in Hotel Giglio Dell Opera (opposite train station)

Entrance to The Colosseum - the greatest amphitheatre of the antiquity, it was built in Rome about 1920 years ago. Dinner at Pizzeria Remo

Foro Romano: Roman Forum (Foro Romano), Rome, Lazio; Walk in the steps of Julius Ceaser and imagine the antique life in the roman forum. It's just incredible!; Baffetto: the best pizza in town; http://www.frommers.com/destinations/rome/D42706.html; Bafetto is an institution in Rome. A very casual typically roman place with excellent pizza for very little money.

Day 3 (28/5) Rome

Head to the Vatican City – visit St Peter Basilica also known as the centre of the Catholic world; Fontana di Trevi (Trevi Fountain) is a string of legends surround the Trevi Fountain, which is situated amid the labyrinthine streets off Via del Tritone. eat ice cream at san crispino. Then go pantheon. gelateria (ice cream).

Gusto

http://www.gusto.it/

This restaurant is one of the hippest in town. It is decorated in a very modern style, the food is simple and excellent, the wine and cheese selections are great.

Day 4 (29/5) Rome --> Venice

Rome termini train (645am) to Venice S.lucia (1035am), check in to Tritone Hotel opposite train station.

Day 5 (30/5) Venice --> Barcelona

Venice Trevisco Airport (1255pm) take ryanair to Barcelona (240pm), check in Hotel Lioret La Rambla.

Day 6 (31/5) Barcelona

Day 7 (1/6) Barcelona --> Paris

From Barcelona (6am) airport take vueling airlines to paris orly (740am). Take train to central station. Check in Hotel Libertel Gare du Nord Suede near train station.

Day 8 (2/6) Paris --> London

Take Eurostar (910pm) to london (1035pm). Check in Tune hotel.

Day 9 (3/6) London

Day 10(4/6) London --> KL

Heathrow Airport 1015pm flight.

: 0

2011-04-30T04:21:00.002+08:00

hello

I went to Blackpool themepark with my pang yao and gateshead family.

i told myself to revise after malaysian night-> after sushi night-> after blackpool

ended up not reading company law now i started to read EU instead :x

so now heheheh im using the usual eve method lastminute, tmr what paper then study what paper

hmmm Amen for me bah!

2011-04-26T05:40:00.002+08:00

self-destruction

2011-04-25T09:51:00.003+08:00

I never let you know.

The night you kissed me on my cheek.

You must ve thought I was asleep.

I wasn't.

I felt extremely sweet and comfort.

Heartwarming.

I miss you..

But, I have to let go.

yesterday

2011-04-23T19:16:00.008+08:00

So yesterday we went out. actually we wanted to go to the Job Centre but we ended up going to metro because I.....

fine, I bought something real expensive. perhaps not for some people, but it is my first time buying that sort of thing. err but the shop was closing down and hence clearance sale. anyway I ve already "kena" from my sis yesterday and nona earlier. tim was pretty speechless.

anyway, i realise some part was missing so I went back to metro to tell em and they actually just gave me w/o enquiring more, maybe they dont bother as the shop is closing down anyway. I actually want to buy the smaller one but this is much worth it after consideration. I love both, still, i know. EXPENSIVE! *kill me

On the way to the bus stop. and this is where we always go if we want to go out. this one is already passed Eldon Square. (Eldon Square is the mall we have here, the place we always go for WINDOW SHOPPING or err lil shopping).

the sun was playing hide and seek with me . sekejap keluar, sekejap hilang. hmmm

that was Lih Jing , looking for her phone.

took this because I felt like doing so, and I tagged Carolyn in this photo cos she told me before she loves the pie there. forgot which one edy =_______=

err

err ok. mai hiam beh bai lah. actually very the beh bai already. taken by timaomao.

then the camwhoring starts....

at ..hmm I dont know what is this park called but it is so beautiful at night, I wanted to take photos of it since winter but. hmm yeah ..=_=

typical ah lian pose of mine?okay okay it is not cold, it is at night though. cos people tend to ask, are you not cold Evelyn? and yes when I was entering shops in Metro , I keep on imagining things like people think I am a chinese prostitute shopping after I get sums of money . full stop

but i love this kind of top. Got it in Primark for 5 pound yo! oh ya Jasmine said im gonna wear only bikini during summer! hmm maybe? lol

err no comment.

...

then to Lau's we go! it has been centuries since we last went there together, so tim, jenny and I were super hungry *hungry ghost looks, so we decided to go there after spending hrs in Metro.

Timaomao and Aaron the kungfu panda :x

me with ebon's fav waffle. hmm

Iqbal's.

ASK ME WHAT I VE EATEN! ask!! fine. I took two plates of prawns, a lot a lot of salmon sushissssssssssssssss, crabsssss, CRABS!! but no crab shells T_T , erm..vege a lot a lot of vege! xiao bai cai i think, marshmallow banana, ice cream coated with choc n white choc T_T, two duck drumsticks, a lot a lot of blackcurrants blablabla

this is lovesss given my jasmine i used it to pamper my poor skin lastnight. lama sudah saya tidak sayang dia. hmm time to love urself more, ebulin!

til the next posts, buh bye...will update on the MU match blablabla.

p/s: i m studying now. lastnight first night starting to do revision for mah exam. HMM :X but ler, day time is half study half online . later going to town to buy ingredients for hotpot tonight and study again yo ~~ library, come, im gonna date you for a month!

2011-04-20T09:14:00.001+08:00

there's something in your eyes, make me want to lose myself, make me want to lose myself, in your arms.....

life in different perspective

2011-04-18T06:25:00.004+08:00

ask yourself, what and which kind you want it to be? nothing is not achievable, just ask yourself, do you want it to happen? should you?

2011-04-17T22:01:00.002+08:00

I miss a lot of things..

I miss him...i am the type of person..i am sad but i dont want to express it out..i dont want to let people see my weakness..i miss him..when he was leaving, i wanted to cry so much i wanted to cry a river but my sis was so down, emotionally and physically breakdown, i couldnt but just.. be strong and strengthened her.

he is the nicest person one could have found and befriend in this world. i am luckier. i was born to be his family, his cousin. he is my mum's elder brother's son. he is my biao ge, Brother Lim Kim Hock.

My impression of him at the time my sis and I were much younger is already us bullying him, because he is such a nice person you see, my sis always ask him, and sa jiao (princess) with him, asked him to take stuff for her..

we were so helpless albeit happy when my mum finally laid her final decision of coming back to kuching, moving there for good. from miri. that was in year 2005, october as the official month because my bro got married in august i skipped school for almost two months before october.

so we went and live with them. at my uncle's house in stephen yong. at times ah fook ll sleep until very late, and when we are bored or naughty or have anything that needs his help, we (or either my sis or i) will wake him up, his sleeping pose will be wrapping himself with his blanket, all over his face as well!

so we ll keep pulling the blanket off and he ll be annoyed a bit but he never scold or raise his voice a bit. he never got mad at anyone. yes, i mean never.

that is why he kept so much things to himself i guess. many a time, i told myself, not to keep focusing on negative thoughts it wont do us anything good but heartache, depression, unhealthy effects... because i dont want to walk the same pathway he walked on. his family , which included us, we were hurt, we..were dead and slowly revived, we are still overcoming it...we dont talk about him very often anymore..although we still cant help changing the way we address the house as ah fook house instead of my q meh or qq house...especially my sis...i know she is greatly affected by this....and my mum...bu i rather we talk about him more often...keep him forever in our memory..dont hide the pain by shutting out mouth up...ah fook...i miss u..i just miss u so much...i just called q meh and ah cheh jiejie spoke on the phone.she was the one picking up. you, used to be the one.the first person to offer doing anything in the home..you did all those w/o any complain or unwillingness.

we , all, still cannot accept the fact that you're gone. that's why everyone is pretending to be strong, to have overcame this, but who says that this incident is to be overcame?

i just need you to be around..i used to chat with weimin.. wei min yi hou wo zhang da le...wa yao zhuan jian, wo mai dao wu zi wo hui yao ah fook gen wo jia yi qi zhu, he shared the same thought...because you know why? even when i was a small girl back then, since that time, q meh n qq would keep on telling mum to take care of you when they re gone for good, as you're their only worry, you're the only worry..

you're our precious ah fook...you always are. im sorry i took you for granted...i ve always known im such a blessful person that God arranged you to be a part of my life..but i never say it out to you...i thought i have many chances later on in my life to make out this point but i am wrong...im sorry ah fook...i miss you..

So I walked away although..

2011-04-17T07:08:00.003+08:00

Di sini kau dan aku
Terbiasa bersama
Menjalani kasih sayang
Bahagia ku denganmu

Pernahkah kau menguntai
Hari paling indah
Ku ukir nama kita berdua
Di sini surga kita

Bila kita mencintai yang lain
Mungkinkah hati ini akan tegar
Sebisa mungkin, tak akan pernah
Sayangku akan hilang...

If we love somebody
Could we be this strong
I will fight to win
Our love will conquer all
I wouldn't risk my love
Even just one night
Our love will stay in my heart
My heart...my heart...

hello : )

2011-04-16T10:39:00.007+08:00

show up,

follow your heart,

have sense of wonders,

learn to forgive,

dont focus on negative thoughts,

focus on creating what you desire,

dance,

pamper yourself,

find someone you love,

stay in the romance,

help others,

have a good night sleep,

be true to yourself

2011-04-15T16:13:00.001+08:00

:) and i smiled.

2011-04-15T11:27:00.002+08:00

and to answer the question i put forward in the previous post myself, hmm I can't , I don't seem to able to express my true self anymore. I cant smile and laugh out laugh when I am happy cos when I do it doesn't mean I am, happy. I can't cry when I feel sad cos I just don't feel like doing so. I mean I feel like crying but I don't know what for? But yet sometimes talking to my friends I wanted to cry so much and when I actually did they will try to stop me from crying, comforting me but they never know the tears felt so warm on my cheeks, as if they have been boiling, waiting, being held too long to be released.

I loved, love, and still feel like loving but my fear overcomes everything. It is so typical of me that I tend to categorize all guys as THE SAME. THE BAD ONES. and of course when I express this standpoint view of mine, each and every guy will protest, saying that they are different, it is unfair to conclude with such general view blablabla

well was I stupid was I unlucky ? it happened that my experience, all of the guys I met they disappointed me when i ..chose to trust them at first..no wait..I meant fall for them w/o realising it? nah..every girl 'd ve known it, if they are falling for someone. but yet we allowed it to happen, dont we? see. I am the type of girl I fall for a guy SO DAMN EASILY. this character of me I hate it so much cos it is what that hurts me? but once I like (and then love) this person, it is very hard for me to ..overcome the heartbreak later on...and when sweet memories went sour, awfully..erm nightmares?

evelyn, what are you doing? are you still you? what are you? well to be honest, I don't know what i am already. i mean, i know, but im trying to run from the reality. my conscience tells me not to hate, not to perceive things in a negative way, but my "self" reacts to hatreds, evil thoughts, grudge, dissatisfaction, greed, longing for someone to belong to you wholly? but how could that be possible?

hey you. yes you. you were not as weak as this. yes there were moments of darkness, then comes the light but you cant rely on the light to much for the fact the light ll eventually have to leave and shine upon others who are in darkness too? so is it not the time to open your eyes now? find your own source of light?

to leave those unhappy things behind, is it possible? perhaps it is not about possibility? perhaps it is about whether you want to erase em' or not. or there are certain things which make you hold on those memories even though they are killing you from inside bit by bit, killing your brightside? well ... perhaps.feelings.emotions.

to her, she ll be loved. at least we do.

people

2011-04-14T12:58:00.001+08:00

can you be true with your feeling?

can you say things your heart feels?

can you laugh out loud when you feel happy and joyful?

can you cry if you feel sad?

can you love without the fear of being hurt?

can you...?

i i s changing :)

2011-04-11T22:31:00.005+08:00

Hello from nyonya po~

2011-04-10T08:47:00.002+08:00

hi butterfly : )

2011-04-08T16:29:00.004+08:00

say hi to my sexy eyes this is taken few days ago and apparently my eyes got even sexier now : )

hi it is 9.28 am in the morning now. and yes i have not gone to bed yet and yes i am not typing what my mind tells me to type well yes but not exactly and properly and : ) tonight's gonna be a good good night well hope my enthusiasm in blogging will come back and remain long enough to post what has been going on lately and ya i have to sleep now else you ll see a very blur panda performing on the stage later omgee thinking of it gives me a lot a lot of nerves

butterflies in stomach-do you still have it? suprisingly or not, i do.

I can has pinku tweeter now

2011-04-07T13:41:00.003+08:00

that i actually created i dunno-since-how-long-ago. am new and still noob to this stupid chirp chirp thingy. but at least it is pinku now and ya thats enough very ngapat that the profile photo cannot be more than 700 kb in size and even more ngapat of me, i dunno how to resize photo so ya..=_=

the reason i revived it? NONA KONG . her friend paksa her so she sort of paksa me also. but ler. im thinking good also la i dont have to spam fb cos certain ppl ll feel annoyed by my frequent/ continuous post? but i doubt i ll post less in fb

sunshine day moody night

2011-04-07T05:27:00.005+08:00

I ve just taken dinner with timothy and Lih jing. Timothy bought a lamb shoulder which he thought 4 pound something but of which turned out to be the price per lb and the whole thing actually costed him 7 pound something. lol hmmm i dont feel very happy now i think it is because im feeling sleepy? or i ve not been eating properly for at least weeks now...err I dont know. was so so so happy when i woke up, took my shower and as i was doing my skincare routine the sunlight was so strong and i just let it shined upon my face (cos i always put my mirror at the window side) .huahuahua hmm how much I miss Kuching. I mean the time spent in Kuching before this. A Level's...of course.. and the normal time in Kuching..No much worries...If I want to go out, and the first person I or my sis n I will thought of will be Nona for sure. Just give her a call if she is at home then tell her we are on the way and ll be reaching in 5 minutes. And Evon ll be cheating her at times, telling her we re really reaching causing Nona to squat and wait outside her house. lol hmm many times I fetched her her hair is still wait because she has to bath last minute..hmm auntie must be angry of me cos I always kidnap her daughter but seriously she is the friend I feel most comfortable being with. anytime or 24/7. how nice if she is one of our sibling huh even my sis thinks that nona seems more like a sis to her cos she is truly a caring and loving friend... @______________@ 4 more months. now what I have to do is, to start seriously read my law for three subjects, namely company law, eu law and evidence. of those 3, the one that scares me the most, i mean the one i 'll have to strive hard enough to recap and grasp the syllabus is company, thank my procrastination and laziness I have been slacking since the very first day I'm here and only for few weeks before this I went to library everyday with vani to study together, mainly covering law for evidence. but then, now we stopped because vani has coursework to do..but then i think studying together don't help much because one has to read a lot , else whatever being discussed together is just bullshit and it wont stay long in your head. hmm..sesiapa lah.berilah saya sedikit, err banyak banyak semangat untuk belajar k. and, I ll just start doing revision after Malaysian Night, which ll take place this Friday. No point starting now..because I AM LAZY and ya this stupid performance stuff took a lot of my time. but the thing I love about it is that I learn how to dance to the song (________) fill in the blank.hahah and it surely make a part of my memories here. err thats all for today. tata nah my sui sui eh photo for today.hahaha

sleepy shit

2011-04-06T13:12:00.001+08:00

2011-04-05T16:50:00.004+08:00

Recently, indeed things are not going that well for me. Yet in such difficult situations, I learnt more things. And as there is no bed of roses and smooth sailing life all the time. Shit happens, and it does to everyone. It all depends on how you view and take things that have happened on you. If you're taking it negatively then it will have only adverse effect on you and conversely if you're tackling it from a positive side of view, you ll learn and eventually gain from it.

Say, a problem. Or even a misfortune, or something very bad that happened on you. If you let it occupy and trouble you mind and soul, it will eventually prevails in you and "eats up" / destroys your soul and mentality, this is true.

So if you try to extract the lesson/ value out of it, you gain. Somehow, you benefit from it. Take the lesson, take the positive gain, and "put down" the negative elements, the trouble itself, the box, the heavy burden, dont let it stay and make home in your heart. Neither your mind. Then only you can move on and walk towards more positive things in your life. Of course, as I ve said earlier, there is no smooth sailing life, inevitably there re be more hurdles, more problems, but at least through the problems we ve encountered and overcame, we learned and indeed have become much stronger than before. We are not those protected birds in the cage. Yes, we are injured, but at least we are flying up high, freely, and stronger than ever. Ok what's with the birds now?? zzz cut the crap, REMEMBER TO BREATHE AND LIFE ( GREAT LIFE!) GOES ON STILL!

nah a photo of a bird to end the post. i dont know what bird is this but this is what we have, a lot of them , walking on the streets in Newcastle and of which timaomao loves to sepak when they walk in front of him zzzz

Gain strength by not reacting to provocations of negative words and deeds directed against you.